I know my calling....to sing for my King. Let's go back a few years...
My musical interests revolved around playing the piano and the saxophone. I begged my parents for piano lessons when I was in 6th grade and they said yes. My lessons were $4 a week and I walked to them every week for a year and a half. We moved after my 7th grade year and had to leave my piano and my lessons behind. I played the saxophone from 7th grade on and I loved it. Even when I started singing in high school the saxophone was my first love.
I didn't begin singing until I was around 15 years old, I hadn't thought about singing. I loved my saxophone, remember? A year or so after "the move", we began attending a little country church...they had a youth choir. They asked my sister and I if we would like to join and we said why not. My sister sang in glee club at our former school but I had only been interested in playing instruments. Much to my surprise and everyone else's, I was a decent singer, who knew? And...I wasn't too shy to sing in front of people, another who knew? The first solo I ever sang at my church was by Petra "The Prayer", I would sing with tapes or CDs or acapella if need be. I sang a duet with a friend at youth church camp the Summer after my freshman year, I was in the high school choirs my Junior and Senior year, I sang at revivals at various churches, in people's living rooms, I would sing whenever anyone asked, anytime, anywhere.
This continued through my adult life, singing in my college show choir, singing at church, cantatas, special events in my or other communities, youth conferences, stupid talent shows...sing, sing, sing. In 2003, I recorded a "demo" CD with 6 songs to tracks, I never really did much with it but was grateful for the opportunity and experience to make it. Once in a while someone asks me about a CD and I get a little embarrassed, I don't know...I really don't think of myself as a big deal and don't want to either, even typing this makes me a little uncomfortable because all this is not about me, it's all about my Jesus and the journey He has led me through.
I did a few concerts at various churches after that which was a great learning experience as well. And eventually I ended up on a worship team at my church...
All the events leading up to now are important and played a role in my life but the last couple of years have been a whirlwind of not only musical growth but more importantly spiritual growth. In the Fall of 2010, I began singing on the worship team at my church, I led a few of the songs for Sunday morning worship and gained some knowledge on what it was like to sing with a live band instead of CDs or the typical church piano. Then in 2013, due to various circumstances, there was a need for an interim Worship leader and I seized the opportunity. It was also at this point that I began singing on Monday nights as well at our Celebrate Recovery meetings, another blessed experience and opportunity. The CR worship leader was a big support and contributed about as much as I did to the Sunday morning process. I can't say that I was great at it because I wasn't but it was an eye opening experience and I am thankful for every minute of it. It taught me a lot about all the work that goes in behind the scenes that nobody sees or notices on Sunday mornings and what kind of leader I was and need to be. Another first during this time...Prison Concerts, the CR worship team took their first concert to prison, it was awesome and we were hooked. Along with that...I began playing the keyboard, I played for a couple songs during the prison concert and a couple times at CR and the very last Sunday morning that I led the music. I was not very good, I just chorded mostly but it put me on a path to things I had only dreamed of.
Five months later we hired a worship pastor, he was wise and gracious and an incredible leader, musically and spiritually. He has taught me a lot about music and worship and has been continually guiding and teaching me to be a better worship leader. I now play keys most Sunday mornings and every Monday night and the craziest part...I'm singing too. That has always been a challenge for me, to sing and play at the same time and I'm still working on it, but I can play for myself and have on several occasions now for revivals or our worship services and the occasional funeral. But the most important life-changing part is the work God has done in my heart. I have a renewed sense of awe and wonder about Him, He has given me a freedom to worship Him like I never had before...what an amazing King I serve. I am humbled by His majesty, undeserving of His mercy and grace, and completely surrounded by His love and presence every day. And I can't wait to see what's next...